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I'm up in Vermont, a place I find myself often on Memorial Day weekend due to the popular Vermont City Marathon... but I've never actually been a participant in the Marathon Event. Today I ran the bike path (the finish for the last 5ish miles of the marathon) for the first time ever and had a lot of thoughts about last year that I wanted to get down somewhere. I trained harder than I've ever trained in my life for this marathon last year. Almost every single thing went perfectly in training up until the very very last week.... and I was left picking up (another) marathon number that would never be worn.  I want to explain what I mean when I say "harder than I've ever trained". I didn't do 100 mile weeks, I didn't do double session runs, I didn't do my long runs at an incredibly blistering pace... It was a cumulative type of "hard work"... a small and consistent amount of work across a really really long period of time. I still feel jaded and slightly heartbroken about the whole thing, but it's probably all worked out for the best... and I can explain my logic behind that later. This post is about the journey and sheer discipline I had to the Vermont City Marathon post surgery and postpartum... I never made it to my destination, but lots was learned on the journey that I'll be ready for when baby number 2 arrives! PRE-OPERATION: I had an unknown "phantom" injury which eventual lead to a knee operation at 23 weeks pregnant. I was 100% committed to getting this injury resolved in order to compete at the Boston Marathon 2015. I was willing to pay whatever money and drive whatever distance to see whatever specialist I could to get this injury "fixed"... I got a diagnosis and set a date for surgery in November giving me barely enough time to get fit for Boston. During pre-operation tests I found out I was pregnant. After a year of searching for answers for my knee, thousands and thousands of dollars, countless specialists... nothing mattered. I was sidelined. I couldn't have surgery. Matt and I were NOT trying (quite the opposite actually... you're looking at one of those people in the 1% on the back of the trojan...) I was freaking out. OPERATION: I had knee surgery pregnant. While many people have criticized me for this, it wasn't a selfish maneuver just so that I could run. I was in a very dark place. I was very depressed about not being able to run. My whole identity has been shaped around running and I've been without it (at this point) for well over a year. I was circling the drain. Pregnancy definitely helped me feel more optimistic about my life, but I was scared about postpartum depression, I worried if I'd ever have the chance to get the surgery once I had a baby (ain't no mom got time for weeks of crutches)... and then again I'd worry about being a horrible mother to my child because I was lacking a coping mechanism for everyday stress... just letting it compound was never going to be good, but I also couldn't do any other cardio activities without pain. I couldn't swim, hike, rock climb, yoga was even hard... I couldn't do really anything without having to stop from swelling and pain. In addition to those worries, there were also completely practical concerns. I could barely walk downstairs at my normal weight... I lived on the third floor... how was I going to get up and down stairs 9 months pregnant? How was I going to squat and pick up a newborn baby.... or a toddler?! I depended on my hands to stand up since my knee was so unstable and so painful.... I had to put aside the Naysayers and trust that this was the best thing for, yes, myself... but in turn my baby! The doctors said it was safe, I had my reasonings... so I went through with it. #worthit
POST OPERATION: Ever try to do stability drills 9 months pregnant? I have. PT twice a week until the baby was born and then more PT after. The injury took so long to diagnose that I ended up with an even bigger imbalance from the constant compensation. Lots and lots of work! Most of the post-operation/pre-baby work was done to avoid getting more scar tissue, but there was a lot of other work I couldn't do because I wasn't able to tilt my hips and use my glutes in the same way I would if I wasn't pregnant... so I had to put some exercises on hold.
PRE MARATHON TRAINING TRAINING: I took about 8 weeks to get clearance to workout from the OBGYN, and then another solid month and a half before I got clearance to run by the PT. My imbalances were pretty severe upon fatigue. I haven't been running for nearly 2 years at this point... Where do I begin? ... I began with 5 minute runs. Yes... 5 MINUTES! Every other day for a while... Some of my runs were 5 minutes running 5 minutes walking, 5 minutes running.... and eventually that turned into 5 minutes easy running, 5 minutes hard, 5 minutes easy. When I say hard, I'm talking a huge pat on the back for anything sub 8:00 pace for only 5 minutes. In that first month (November, an entire year after the original surgery date) I ran a total of 46.6 miles. This is where my starting point was. I was 34 days into running when I signed up for the Vermont City Marathon and I was averaging 10 miles a week. I ran a 5k to get a time for a starting point. 22:21. My slowest 5k ever (until recently haha!). I was over 50 days into running before I got to 20 miles per week. 50 days!!! So for those of you just trying to start out and pushing yourselves too hard don't worry! Although I didn't break 3 hours when I planned, I did run a 1:25:40 half marathon at 6 months postpartum... and it took me over 50 Days to reach a 20 mile week. I"m 7 months pregnant and doing more than that. It's not about the mileage all the time. THE BEGINNING OF MARATHON TRAINING: My husband coached me, and the big question was always "How do we build gradually and quickly at the same time" If I went too quick I'd get hurt, but I only had 7 months total to get in PR shape for a marathon after surgery and a baby, and many of those months had already passed. My monthly mileage built from that 46 to 93 and then to 144.... and then it plummeted. We made a mistake. I was still well over my "normal" training weight as I put on weight from both pregnancy and the 2 year hiatus from injury. I never concerned myself with weight.... I was concerned with performance, the weight would come off in time. I kept it in mind when I ate, but didn't look at a scale. I judged my "weight" on my efficiency and how I felt running. HOWEVER, my shins couldn't handle it the extra pounds. The ONE thing my PT told me to do that I didn't (because it seemed silly) was jump rope. It now made sense. He wanted me to jump rope so my body could acclimate to the weight but in a controlled way. I emailed my PT for some suggestions and couldn't afford to take any days off that were not absolutely necessary. Remember, I wasn't trying to just run a marathon, I was trying to break 3, I was trying to PR.. and at this point in time I was projected to be in the mid 3:30's. My PT suggested cross training and soft surfaces. I began to do ONLY runs in the grass and on the soft trail. I did 8 mile runs circling grass fields... I also switched workouts to hills to be able to increase heart rate etc. without the same level of impact. I walked the downhills. I used the eliptical, my least favorite thing in the world. My February miles were 85 total... I was behind schedule to get in sub 3 hour shape. At this point everyone else was just starting their marathon training for Vermont, so I did take comfort knowing that even with the days off I still wasn't "technically" in the window where I would normally begin marathon training. I made an early enough mistake that I could recover from it in time... but I still had a lot of obstacles ahead of me.  BREASTFEEDING AND TRAINING: In the beginning, I was only doing short runs, so it was pretty easy to fit in a run around Raea's nursing schedule. It got a bit more difficult when I started getting my mileage back up. A lot of people are asking about training and breastfeeding. This was probably the hardest part and the most underestimated. Raea was tiny (5th percentile), so I was worried that somehow I wasn't feeding her enough... now in hindsight she just doesn't eat that much at a time... but because I was oversupplied and my kid never over ate, if I had a long run I would feed her and then pump so that I wouldn't be painfully engorged by the end of the run. My husband was also training for a marathon (he ended up running a 2:39, his goal was sub 2:40) I'd do all this while he was on his long run. Did the hormones slow me down? The short answer is no but part of that is because I wasn't just running. The hormones released from breastfeeding make you more elastic and loose. You can lose some of that snap or quick turn over from it... so to compensate I did a crap load of speed workouts and an even bigger crap load of drills. Drills drills drills.Every Friday I had Agility Drills and Strides at the end of an easy run. Drills were things like high knees, butt kicks, bounding, skips, a million different hopping type of agility things. On Tuesdays or Wednesdays (whatever day I didn't do speed) I did stability drills. These were all more balancing, core, strength. A lot of bosu ball stuff. These were my favorite because I did them with Raea! On Mondays I did really really slow trail runs to keep my ankles, shins and lower legs strong. I running on the undulating terrain kept those smaller shin muscles working hard. I also did yoga on Mondays at home. So these were all part of my "easy" days so on the other days I was running fast. I was basically doing things to improve speed every day of the week (except Sunday Long Runs) even when I wasn't actually doing speed work. That's the great benefit of drills, they help your speed without destroying your body. 
 How did I keep up with Calories? I'm lucky enough to be married to a Nutrition Counselor. My husband graduated from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, so I was pretty good. Each day I'd wake up to feed Raea. I'd pump on the opposite side that I fed her on because again I was over supplied and she'd never take the second boob, so I'd be in lots of pain by the time I even got to work. I found that I got more milk pumping if I was also feeding and I was constantly worried that my oversupply would run out once I got to real marathon training, so I needed to stock up and keep everything flowing! I was always in a hurry out the door so breakfast was probably my worst meal as I ate it in the car. I had usually a peanut butter bagel (I miss peanut butter) and half a green smoothie. It was a strange thing because I needed to lose weight but also keep the caloric intake high. The biggest difference I made was eating lunch twice. The second thing I did was change the type of lunch I normally have. Lunch is always my biggest meal. Normally I would do leftovers from the night before (mostly out of laziness), but this stopped. Every day I pumped at 11:30-11:45 during my students lunch/recess, and then ate my actual lunch while nursing Raea (my parents house is next door to the school, so I'd get to see her!) from 1:00-1:30 when a large portion of my students had specials (art, music, gym). I did not take a prep because of the extra feeding. At 11:30 I would eat a basic spinach salad and it was mostly just greens, a few veggies, cheese, and crutons. Then at 1:00 I would have a veggie sandwich with apple, cheese, more greens, cucumbers, peppers, and occasionally a tempeh or veggie "meat". I made sure to have some dense yogurt (I never get low fat and always the whole milk), and I'd put nuts and granola in it (I'm now allergic to nuts... so, that's not going to happen anymore) I'd have the second half of my green smoothie that I had for breakfast, and usually a banana or an orange. I ran at 3:30/4:00 every day so I didn't want to eat anything that would be too heavy. For dinner we mixed it up but a lot of rice and beans and quinoa with tofu, tempeh. Or pasta with the soy crumbles. I never turned down dessert. When did I stop breastfeeding? My first breastfeeding goal was to make it to 6 months. Then to a year, then after that I just decided to wean when it felt right for Raea. She was a breast milk addict so the day I got a positive test for pregnancy was pretty much when I stopped. I thought it'd take the whole 9 months to wean, but I said no once and she had no interest in me anymore. I still lactated for the next two months so I had to manually express occasionally just to relieve the pressure. I actually got an infection from the sports bras and the engorgement but This wasn't until well after Vermont so I wont get into that anymore. I could probably write an entire blogpost on training and breastfeeding, but these are to address some of the questions I've received. If I think of anything else I'll do a followup. I"m sure I'll be learning even more when October comes around.  LACK OF SLEEP: Truthfully, this wasn't a real issue for me. I had Raea sleeping in 6 hour stretches by the time she was 2-3 months when I was only running 10 miles a week. I have lived off of 6 hours of sleep for a long time. Often she'd wake up at 4am and I'd take her in bed with me, nurse her on my side, and fall back to sleep. NOT ADVISED by doctors and hospitals and all that other stuff, but I was very aware of where she was, I knew she was safe, I wasn't worried about it. She was already capable of pushing blankets away and rolling over at 3 months and by 4am I was only lightly sleeping. So for months I just had her in my bed for the last two hours. Breastfeeding was the hardest and yet easiest thing because I got way more sleep because of it (albeit very poor sleep, it was better than the alternative) Tonight is Raea's first night in a toddler bed, I really buckled down with sleep once I cut night time/4am feedings completely (around 6 months when she started solids). I modify behavior for a living and feel like I applied all the theories I've ever read to sleep and came up with a really great way of making going to bed positive instead of "crying it out". I'm hoping it works for baby number 2 and for the toddler bed! If not, I know that I would put my bodies needs before training. Some days I'd probably train through a tired phase, but I'd most likely trade some easy days for some extra sleep. Sleep is where your muscles repair!   MARATHON TRAINING: I kept track of everything on strava, and I had a print out of my entire schedule. We'd print a new one if I needed to make adjustments. I religiously came home and put a big "X" over each day. After February everything went perfect. In March I ran 192 miles, and in April I ran 261. Ramping up the mileage would not have been possible without all the additional work I have already mentioned. That buildup from March through to the taper looked like this weekly: 24.6, 29.6, 39.5, 50.6, 49.1 55.9, 60.5, 64.4, 64.9, 65.0, Then I started coming back down very gradually. I was 190 days of running when I pulled my calf, and just about a week out from the marathon. During the whole training cycle I had massages, I went to the chiropractor, I took ice baths... all in ADDITION TO the drills. At some point in peak training I did ease off on the drills because I was really, really tired. Hardest workout? There was no ONE workout that stands out as the hardest. It was a cumulation of workouts that got hard. The most mentally difficult phase was in the first phase where every single Saturday it seemed I had a two mile tempo. At this point in time I still wasn't in great shape, so I would get really nervous that I wouldn't get faster as the weeks went on... I would also have a really hard time not getting discouraged that two miles was SO hard! Here is my progression:        I would say the hardest was when we started combining the tempo runs with track workouts. Track workouts in themselves are not hard for me. I have spent years mastering the perfect pacing on the track, and I've run intervals much faster than you'll ever need for a marathon... so the track didn't stress me out... but the fatigue that would set in from the tempo run right before would make getting up to interval speed difficult. I think these were the most important workouts I did.  Workout I enjoyed the most: Easy "Ryan Hall" runs in the trails. A common mistake runners make is not using recovery runs to recover. I did not make that mistake. I ran really slow in the trails almost every Monday. While no cardiovascular gains were made, I was able to use the softer terrain to recover and build stability.  What I would do Differently: Other than the glaring error I made at the very very end of the training cycle (coming up next) I would do more hills during long runs or the day after long runs on tired legs. I did most of my long runs on flatter terrain as the course I was training for is flat. However, I did one long run from my house because there were baby showers and other things I needed to get to, and that's when I realized my knee was still unstable when it gets fatigued, and this concerned me. It wasn't the ultimate demise of all this hard work, but it was the first time since February that I felt like we left something out, and it was too late to make it up... I just was glad Vermont City isn't hilly...  WHAT WENT WRONG: I was within the 10 day forecast of the race and still going strong. Temps were rising and we were creating a new plan. I had run a 1:25 half with the first 6 miles at marathon pace... so a HUGE negative split...Using the VDOT calculator (religiously) I was projected at sub 3 hours across the board with all the workouts and now a race. I had ONE marathon pace workout left and I was WIPED OUT Physically and Mentally. We had done a lot of driving the day before and at work I just didn't feel right. I felt extremely bad. So Matt told me to cut the marathon pace run in half if I didn't feel good (from 8 miles to 4) or to do it the following day. My schedule with a babysitter the next day was not good, so I just said "fuck it... I haven't missed a single thing... I'm not missing today!"... I had to stop at a crosswalk during the marathon pace run (that felt really easy even though it was in the 90's and no shade)... and when I started up again I got a cramp in my calf and that was it. The cramp was most likely caused from dehydration. I felt behind on hydration all day from being in an old unairconditioned school. I had a meeting on the second floor the last hour of the day basically in a giant closet with no windows. I knew I didn't feel right, but I was stubborn. I let my obsession with the training plan take over what I knew was right for my body. Stopping at the cross walk and then suddenly starting was all it took for the cramp to become a more serious injury. I knew it was over. Everyone else tried to convince me the calf would heal if I stayed off it for 10 days... and that I wouldn't notice in the race, but I know my body and I know once I have a calf pull I'm out for 2-3 weeks minimum.... and I only had 10 days. Of course I got dry needling, massage, chiropractic care, active release therapy, graston... The works in! I attempted running the Thursday before the marathon and I couldn't make it 400m. Just like that, 190 days of training was all for nothing. It took two months to heal because I tried to run a marathon a month later just to get a BQ in... (made it to 18.6 before a DNF)... but there was no coming back from this.  BLESSING IN DISGUISE: I have literally never been so heartbroken. It would be impossible to include all the sacrifices (I should note: I sacrificed a lot, but It wasn't like I missed my baby's first 10 months of life... I breastfed, which basically means I can never be away from her for too long. Other than running she was with me for all of it!), you could never understand the work of art a Sunday Morning was and how Matthew and I made it possible for both of us to be in great marathon shape at the same time with a newborn. My mother was a huge help, his mother was a huge help, sneakerama (where he worked) was a huge help SO many people helped us... and even though I didn't get to run, I still felt all that love and support. As it turned out the Vermont City Marathon got SO HOT that they deemed it unsafe and shut it down... so if you were slower than 3:45 you didn't get a finishing time... and if you were faster than that, you still had a slow day. It was really, really hot! I would have most likely ran in the 3:05-3:10 range based on other competitors I knew there.... I would have done something stupid like try and break 3 hours and totally blown up. The biggsest blessing is that NOW I'm having a baby! If I had run this marathon I would have run Boston 2017 and I'd just now be thinking about another child. I would never want to change the circumstances I'm in. I'm so grateful for the little baby I have growing inside me! This also may workout for the best. Since I now have my sights (long term) set on the Olympic Trials, I have more time. I was going to run Boston 2017, have another baby and try to do the OTQ in two training cycles. Now I'll have more than that! There's always a plan! 
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 Baby Germain is the size of a cabbage? This week's craving: Ice Cream (bring on that Ben and Jerrys factory!) This week's aversion: Nothing. How cute is this shirt? Running for Two! For Two Fitness! MONDAY- 3 miles with Caroline: I had no intention of running on this day because I was planning to go to Yoga, but I try to take advantage of the days someone is willing to run my turtle pace... I also try to take advantage of days where Raea is not with me. SO I ran AND went to yoga. The run I felt remarkably smooth and comfortable considering the stroller race the previous day. Unfortunately, even though I really felt like I got a lot out of yoga, my right side was so tight that I really just created more imbalance in my body. My left side loosened up so much but I couldn't get my right piriformis to release. I left feeling a bit "off"... and this wasn't the first time this has happened in yoga. TUESDAY- 3 at Wire Village loops with Stroller: I was so happy to pick Raea up from work today, but she was not so happy to see me. I was only a tiny bit later than normal, but just late enough that they were heading outside... and Raea was MAD that I was there! She wanted to play so bad! I promised her play time after the run. Unfortunately she's less than two years old so she didn't understand. The fight to buckle her tightened my neck quite a bit... then the pushing of the stroller tightened it more... I didn't notice how bad it was until I stopped, so at least I got the run in. I let Raea play as promised, but my neck pain was super concerning.... WEDNESDAY- 0: The neck pain was so severe that I had to leave work early. I went right to the chiropractor. It helped, but only temporarily. I tried a lot of different topical creams to help.... and got some mild relief... but running was out of the question. It hurt to swallow it was so bad! THURSDAY- 5 Fun Run Miles. I doubled down and went to the chiropractor again today. I felt MUCH better and ran 5 at the fun run in the rain. I ran with two people who were new to the fun run and I was glad they went the full 5 with me! It's so much easier with company! FRIDAY- 3 morning Miles . I had to run in the morning today because Matt had to take the stroller with him early up to Vermont. He had to work the marathon expo so I almost wasn't able to go with him because I can't miss work anymore! My friends were going up too, and agreed to take myself AND Raea up to meet Matt! It's a 4 hour drive to Vermont... and Raea is rebelling in the car a bit more... I have nice friends!! I wanted to alleviate the amount of STUFF Cat and Pat would have in the car but didn't want to miss a run simply because I didn't have the stroller... so morning run it was. Raea was up all night for literally no reason... So for the first time since she was maybe 2 months old, I had less than 5 hours of sleep... way less. Getting up early was not easy, but it was worth it! SATURDAY- 6 Stroller miles on the Burlington Bike Path. Today was a long day in the car and a lot of things out of my comfort zone. Traveling with a toddler ins someone else's car is stressful even when Cat and Pat continued to assure me she wasn't bothering them, she was bothering me! So whiny! I think since I was sitting in the back with her she was extra demanding! Then having to make executive plans without Matt to decide for me isn't my favorite thing. He loves to explore and plan and create and itinerary for food and runs etc. I hate it... but I did a good job! Unfortunately napping wasn't on Raea's agenda... but we did try. I was exhausted. I tried not to drink too much fluids on the car ride because of the bathroom breaks that would need to happen, and in the last mile of this run I felt the dehydration. I got really bad Braxton Hicks contractions... and they wouldn't stop for most of the night. I drank a bunch of coconut water and once Raea was in bed and I could relax they subsided. PHEW! SUNDAY- 6.2 with Cat Matt and I slept in and missed half of the Marathon... I totally expected Raea to be up all night in the hotel as she normally is... but I was VERY glad that I finally found a way to keep her sleeping. She woke up once for less than 3 minutes in the night. Parenting win! Unfortunately the reason I woke everyone up swearing in pain. I had stretched my legs out while sleeping and got a calf cramp from the depths of Hell. My neck also cramped up again1 I thought for sure running wouldn't happen, but again I attributed this to dehydration and pounded a gatorade and some water and hoped for the best. I managed to run with Cat and we ran along the marathon course after Pat finished. It was nice because the course was supported with water and spectators still... so it helped keep any additional cramping at bay and kept my mind focused on running rather than pain.I later iced my legs in Lake Champlain. **TOTAL MILES: 26.5** It was a really, REALLY tough week with weird injuryish things popping up... but I still pulled off my marathon! Next week might be different though. I'm still quite sore after the long ride, but hoping some yoga tomorrow can help! Training: -Yoga -Chiropractor -Icing in open water Looking Forward To: The Worcester Firefighters "6k". Two weeks! Gender Prediction: The girls who sold me Lemonade for a dollar (inflation!!!) said girl, but some random lady at lake champlain said boy. I think Boy this week. LOOK OUT FOR: I started a blog post about my experience with postpartum training. I have a lot of pregnant woman following me on Instagram now, and some with their first baby. I was inspired by my return to the Vermont City Marathon to begin a post about training postpartum but then I realized... I should see what kind of questions people have... I obviously can't answer anything that a Doctor needs to answer, but I can offer my own personal experience if it's helpful! comment below, on my instagram post or send me a direct message! INSTAGRAM: I'm really enjoying instagram as an outlet for my pregnancy training. Training at this phase in pregnancy is not easy! And it's nice that a simple hashtag can connect me to so many other pregnant runners (#pregnantrunner #runnignpregnant). There's not a lot of research out there on how to do this, so we are all learning from eachother! You can follow me here: c_mom_run_fast My goal is to: a. inspire, empower, and share my story with others since there is VERY LITTLE on running and competing pregnant out there b. Just to get my fat ass out the door each day and the more followers I have the more I feel like I have an obligation to go! Whatever works! Those of you following and commenting are helping me more than you know! Thanks again for your support!    THE CAUSE This Past weekend I ran the 4 Jakes Sake 5k. While I'm certainly proud of how I did, I'm more proud of the cause that I ran for. My team, The Sisu Project, has become very involved with this cause. My teammate David "Passion" Zanca has gotten very close with Jake and his family over the years and we, as a team, have as well. Jake Marrazzo was diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy just before his 8th Birthday. This is a degenerative muscular disease. The onset is between 3-5 years old. 4 Jakes Sake is now a charitable foundation that helps families with the simple things that we take for granted. Creating a ramp just so a child can get into their house, for example! Offsetting any costs to make the home more handicapped accessible, giving kids independence and the ability to live each day they have as fully as possible. I remember going to a Gala a few years back to help Jake get an elevator in his house so he can get to his bedroom without being carried. Jake is now a teenager! Could you imagine being a teen and needing to be carried into your house or up into your room by your parents?! We all just want what is best for our children, and a little bit can go a long way for these families! Please consider donating to this cause! Click the link below! Donate to 4 Jakes Sake! Also, follow them on facebook!4 Jakes Sake on Facebook! THE RACE This is the first time I've been able to attend the race due to surgery and injury... but I wasn't going to let pregnancy keep me from the race. Matt was going to go to the Harpoon 5 Miler, he accidentally double booked himself... (I blame the time change in Switzerland) but since I had picked him up at the airport, my sister still had my car and we woke up totally forgetting that I did not have a car to get to a different race than he was at....and we didn't have enough time to get my car and then get where we both needed to go... SO Matt and I BOTH went to 4 Jakes Sake 5k... and I think it worked out for the best! I was in such a hurry that I forgot my watch! It was actually pretty nice to be free of that expectation and knowing exactly what mile I was at and how I was doing. It helped me to fully embrace listening to my body. I genuinely thought that racing with the stroller would keep me from getting too competitive, but that was NOT the case! ... I just can't turn that part of my brain off if I tried....It's okay though! Raea had fun going faster than turtle pace for once!! I started the race pretty far back to keep the stroller out of the way of other people (again, I thought I was just going to have fun....), so I spent the majority of the race passing people. Navigating the traffic, sidewalks, curbs, and participants with the stroller was tricky... I thought about navigating the world with a wheelchair... At times I almost had to come to a complete stop to get up and down sidewalks. I made sure to always put the safety of the three of us first at all times, but it certainly wasn't easy to get around! I got extra cheers for pushing the stroller... and on occasion someone noticed I was also pregnant, so the positive momentum generated from the extra challenges were nice! I assumed the water stop was somewhere near the halfway mark and I was still feeling really fresh. It came at a perfect time, just around the only "hill" in the course. Truth be told, this isn't a real hill... but 7 months pregnant pushing a toddler? It was a hill, today! Nothing like being in a wheelchair going up heartbreak hill... I had watched a lot of that just a month ago... but it was my own little challenge. The Braxton Hicks contractions kicked in so I went through the water stop real slow to let those ease off a little bit and then I carried on. It's an odd feeling because I'm way more fit than the pace I'm able to go. I'm hardly breathing heavy, the struggle is more... ya know... that big belly in my way messin' with my stride!... I talked to Raea a lot. She cheered for me and the others saying "go, go, go!" the whole time! She also pointed out every dog, cat, and car we went by! (there were lots of cars that go "vrrmmm vrmmmm!") I got to a section where there was a construction site which was only about 25 meters long. It put me in a tricky situation with the stroller. I had to slow my pace significantly out of fear I would get a flat... BUT From that point on I knew where I was so I began to pick it up. My breathing became a little labored, but still conversational. My lungs have less space now so it was more a discomfort of not getting the air in that I'm used to being able to get and having to work harder to take a full breath... It's a little different sensation than a full effort with lactic acid build up and a body that just can not process oxygen quick enough. I thought about Jake and others with similar disabilities. We take for granted the easiness of breathing. Our muscles just involuntarily do it. Matt and I recently watched a movie called Extraordinary Measures... it focuses on Pompe's disease. It's not the same, however there are some similarities in the sense that the disease progresses over time and it effects many muscles and the surrounding organs. These thoughts were fresh in my mind as one of the characters nearly dies from her lungs and diaphragm not being strong enough... I carried on. I heard my teammates and picked it up. I rounded the corner and could see the clock reading 22:50's and I pushed harder because I've missed too many barriers too many times in my life! Unfortunately I crossed around 23:01. I was disappointed as my last pregnancy race was 20:04...another time I just missed a barrier.... both were faster than I expected, but I hate those seconds hanging over my head! I later found out that since I started so far back my time was 22:56! I'm used to starting right on the line because USATF team results are scored based on gun time... so this was an unusual circumstance, but I'll take it! Raea, Matt, Baby Germain and I all came home with Hardware. Matt won first overall, I got second, and we also double dipped for age group prizes... PLUS the finishers medal! Raea wore it proudly and points to it saying "muma"... Melt my heart! It was a beautiful day and an amazing cause! People often ask me why I'm still running pregnant, what is the point? Well, the point is that I'm healthy, and that I can do it... and there are others out there who can not. Jake was quoted before the race saying "Mom, we are so lucky, nothing bad ever happens to our family"... It's all about perspective! From my perspective, getting out and enjoying my health is the best way I can honor my body and the gift of health that God has given me! Don't take the little things for granted! It's the little things that make the biggest difference! So DONATE a little to 4 Jakes Sake to make a Big Difference!!     Baby Germain is the size of a cucumber. I just have no words for the vegetable sizes. eggplant > cucumber. This week's craving: Nothing much... Just eating what feels good... sometimes that's a salad, sometimes that's ice cream... This week's aversion: Nothing.... No Hunger Strike this week. (see what I've done there? RIP Chris Cornell) MONDAY- 0: Glucose Test, Pertussis Vaccine Shot, Dropping car off at the shop, Home Depot, and to Boston to drop husband off at the airport. Today was a planned day off from work and from running. Too many things going on and I wasn't sure how the Glucose Test would effect me throughout the day.... especially since I've been having digestion problems. TUESDAY- 3.1 miles on Spencer Rail Trail, 34:04 10:53/mi: First fully solo parenting day. Up early to drive Raea to Day Care, off to work, work a full day, rush out after bus duty to drive 30 minutes to get Raea, then off to the Spencer Rail Trail... Which is only 3.1 mile out and back. I thought this would be flat and easy but it was really hilly and bumpy... and I imagine it gets really buggy later in the year because it was mostly wetlands. Wont be back here often unless I'm desperate. The run was slow but I did talk to Matt on the phone during it (without headphones). So I'm pushing the stroller, talking on the phone, running up hill. The 6 hour time difference is tricky! Bathroom Breaks: 1 WEDNESDAY- 3 with Jane in some weird industrial park in the middle of nowhere. 9:34/mi. Jane is home so she helped me retrieve my car at the shop. It was SO hot! I considered running to the shop but there is no shade coverage there, and I didn't want to do 5 in the 90 degree heat pregnant... It just seemed like a bad idea...so I opted out. My mom wanted to go swimming... so, Jane and I followed her out to some pond on the very edge of the town I live in (which is... in the middle of NO WHERE). We found this side road to run on that looked flat (which I needed because... I'm pushing the stroller all week)... but it led us to this strange industrial "no tresspassing" area... It was creepy and cool... although I'd never run there alone. I could totally see myself doing XC repeats there though! Mildly challenging terrain with the softer dirt... but the low impact was nice. Bathroom Breaks: 1 THURSDAY- 3 8:46/mi Another Daycare Drop off and Pick up day, but having the fun run kept me motivated. the ONE day this week I didn't need to push stroller! Another 90 Degree day but it cooled off by the evening. I most likely ran 3.3 today but my watch never caught up to the run (cuz I'm so fast! hahahaha). I didn't realize that Geoff Smith, 2x Boston Marathon winner was running right behind me until he said something about not letting the pregnant woman beat him... SO we ran together. It was awesome. I normally am pretty good about keeping a running conversation going but his knowledge, experience, and workout he used to do are so far ahead of what I can even quantify as possible that I can't even say anything useful... I'm just in awe. The best moment was when I told him I was planning to do the 2018 Boston Marathon and he said he's in the 65+ age group now... and my response was "what is the qualifying time for you?"... a fairly normal question when someone enters a new age group... his response: "I don't need to qualify"... Yeah, I guess when you win Boston multiple times and go to the Olympics you have a lifetime pass. Bathroom Breaks: 0 FRIDAY- 3 on Rutland Rail Trail with Raea. I was DRAGGING! I set a goal to be under 10/mi and I JUST managed! . I had to bring my car to get inspected. But since I sort of have two cars right now, this has been a crazy juggling situation. Jane has been using my car all week but I wasn't going to make her do the errands for it. So when I got out of work, my normal window of opportunity to run stroller free, I had to take the car across two to get re-inspected at the same shop it failed at. Friday Traffic ruining my groove! I just decided to go right to rutland and not think twice about it. 3 miles. Anyone can suffer for 3 miles... and suffer I did. Raea had fun though! SATURDAY- 6 decent paced miles in some heat with Chrissy (and Raea) 8:34/mi LAST day with Matt in Switzerland! Busy Busy day! I had so much work for school to get done but Raea was an angel all day that I somehow managed it all and was still able to get a run in before heading to Boston to pick up Matt. Really proud of how I managed EVERYTHING this week. But also really grateful I don't need to do this again for a while. Bathroom Breaks: 1 SUNDAY- 8 total 5k Race 22:56 official time, second place!! I raced with Raea and Baby today! I also hit my goal of running a marathon in the week. This was a very last minute decision since Matt double booked himself... but it was closer to home and closer to our hearts and way more baby/stroller friendly than the other option. I will be doing a full race recap later in the week but I chose to run with the stroller to keep myself from getting too competitive.... and that didn't work. I was just as competitive only I was pushing a stroller carrying a 28 week old baby bump like a boss. One thing is for sure, I can still get my ass movin' if I want to. I had this weird goal to break 6 minutes in the mile on the track in my third trimester... I think running this race puts that goal to rest. What for? To prove I can? Who cares? I'm sure I can, but I'm just going to keep doing things that present themselves naturally instead of forcing a time trial. This indicated to me that my fitness is still good... 12 more weeks! (an entire marathon training cycle more to go... which should put things in perspective for any runners out there that think I'm 'almost there'... I'm not even close) **TOTAL MILES: 26.4** After last week I realized that running a weekly marathon isn't a bad goal. I almost gave up on it today because what's the difference between 25 in training and 26? Not much... but the difference is achieving a goal or not. SO I cool down after the race until I hit my goal. It was especially hard this week since most were pushing the stroller. Additional Training: -I had no time for anything additional at all this week. Feeding myself daily and feeding my baby daily and keeping the house cleaned while fitting in runs and a full time job was enough! LOTS OF SQUATS! Cleaning up after and chasing around a toddler is no easy task Lessons Learned: Still Got it Looking Forward To: Looks like the Vermont City Marathon might not be happening since relay registration closed before regular marathon registraion and we missed the cut off. It might be for the best. I'm still looking forward to that weekend though... like I said, teachers live their lives from one extra day off to the next. We have one *bonus* day left before the final countdown. Gender Prediction: A man a the lab who was also getting blood drawn was very convinced I was having a boy... and this week I tend to agree with him. I feel comfortable with either option now that I've settled on names for both! I'm pretty excited! What to look out for: I will be doing a full race recap coming soon as well as a second trimester reflection. Stay tuned for those posts! If you don't already: feel free to follow me on instagram. It's just another avenue I've used to keep myself motivated throughtout this process, and motivate others as well! You can follow me here: c_mom_run_fast My goal is to: a. inspire, empower, and share my story with others since there is VERY LITTLE on running and competing pregnant out there b. Just to get my fat ass out the door each day and the more followers I have the more I feel like I have an obligation to go! Whatever works! Those of you following and commenting are helping me more than you know! Thanks again for your support!     Baby Germain is the size of an Eggplant This week's craving: Lots of yogurt This week's aversion: Nothing.... Just praying the heartburn doesn't come back! MONDAY- 3.1: Kicked this week off with a workout. I'm getting bored of running almost every day and having no goals to pursue except to run. After a full day of work, coming straight home and sitting on my ass contemplating running or not for about an hour... I had my feet up the earliest I ever have before and MAN it felt GOOD! But even Raea wanted me to get going... so I did. This run was particularly boring so to mix it up I did one mile interval in the middle. My goal was to break 7:00/mi and I ran 7:01!! I was bummed and wanted a re-do... but Matt had dinner waiting and I said it'd only be 3 miles. Bathroom Breaks: 1 TUESDAY- 6.1 in 54ish minutes. Just squeaking under 9:00/mi WITH stroller! I picked up Raea from Day Care and drove over to the Rutland Rail Trail. I didn't want to run. I REALLY didn't want to run. Do I ever really want to run anymore? I'm not sure...? I texted Matt what time I was leaving since I was on the trail solo and forgot my GOGuarded. I told him I'd do 3 miles... but I felt good so I stopped halfway through and texted him to let him know I was continuing and doing 6. I felt really good, actually! and encouraged to keep on going this week Bathroom Breaks: 2 WEDNESDAY- 5 on the West Boylston Rail Trail I got the cutest text message from Matt asking if I'd run with him while I was at work. What he really meant was "will you meet me at the rail trail today, I'll run one mile with you" but thats fine by me. I'm hoping for a marathon PR for him this fall so I don't want to slow him down! I felt good again on the trail so I decided now is the time to go for that sub 7:00/mi! Matt had the stroller and I bolted ahead. Determined to get sub 7 this time I put a little more effort in the earlier part of the mile than I did on Monday. Just to be SURE there was no assistance from any elevation loss I only went in the direction the trail goes up. I gained 42 feet of elevation and ALSO ran 6:33! I was happy with this! I think on a track I could for sure run sub 6... but there's no point. I should stop before this becomes a complete thought. Matt caught up on my recovery and pushed the stroller to 2.5 then I turned around with Raea and he did his tempo run. #teamworkmakesthedreamwork Bathroom Breaks: 2 THURSDAY- 3.2 An unusual morning run before Matt left for work. Raea came down with a fever before bed the night before. She wasn't acting sick at all but with a fever she couldn't go to Day Care and so I had to stay home. Also, I wanted to be there to monitor if her symptoms got worse and make sure I was there. Mostly just seems like teething- I can see her molars coming in. The Doctor said on the phone the fever was too high for teething but no other symptoms developed.... so, who knows? Anyway, I ran a super easy 3ish, got slightly turned around on the Midstate trail, but it only added a tiny bit. It was a beautiful morning! Sadly I spent most of the day inside because I didn't want to be irresponsible and take Raea out, but she was pretty good. Bathroom Breaks: 0 FRIDAY- 0: No running Caroline's Prom #Priorities. Raea still had a fever late the night before so Matt cancelled one of his events and I went to work. Raea eventually was dropped off at my moms where I was doing Caroline's make-up for prom (I know, I never wear make-up, but I weirdly know how to apply it to others pretty well...? at least better than Caroline herself!) Caroline looked amazing! Raea was a bit cranky today but when she saw Caroline in her dress she got super excited and happy! Caroline was all set for prom and also packed and ready to go for her race the following morning! I remember those days! My friends couldn't understand why I would skip post-prom for a track meet! I enjoyed dinner with my other sister Mary and my mom instead. SATURDAY- Barely managed 3 treadmill miles. Well, Matt was gone... again... he's gone a lot at night with this job... and since I'm gone in the morning we basically never see each other.... but we make the most of it when we do! My stomach was responding negatively to pretty much everything I had to eat. I didn't feel sick at all just a side effect from pregnancy I think... I also took my supplements in the morning because I forgot the night before. This has been a common issue for me that I just have to deal with... but with some negative thoughts creeping in I'm pretty proud I just... managed.... Bathroom Breaks: 0 SUNDAY- 6 with District Champion in the Mile (5:17)! I had worse digestion issues today than the day before, so made countless pit stops and was gratetful for every tree and for the fact that it was raining and the trail wasn't as busy as usual. I'm hoping I figure out what triggers this soon! Still Many weeks to go! Bathroom Breaks: 4? All in the last 3 miles. **TOTAL MILES: 26.4** A few weeks ago running a marathon in a week was depressing. Now? that's turned into the goal. How much longer can I run 26 miles a week? We will find out! Additional Training: -Kinetic Revolution. I only did 1 day. I'm just too damn tired. I also started some pelvic floor exercises to prevent any abdominal separation. Just some really basic pelvic tilt stuff that seems pointless but could make a big difference. Lessons Learned: Just keep grinding. Looking Forward To: Keeping my eyes on the finish line at Vermont City Marathon. It means more to me (symbolically) than I thought it would. BUT something in the more immediate future is my Mothers Day dinner, which is just about ready! LOVE this family photo, but looking forward to a new one in a few months! Gender Prediction: I finally think I'm settled on a girl name and I think it's a boy now! haha! It's going to be fun to find out in the delivery room! Questions: On instagram I've been getting a lot of Direct Messages with questions about running pregnant that range from safety of heartrate to what I'm wearing for support. While I'm no doctor and can't answer all questions, if there's anything I can help with, or anything you'd like to know more about comment below and I'll be happy to share! And if you aren't following me on Instagram, this blog is basically a recap of my day to day recap on there. You can follow me here:c_mom_run_fast My goal is to: a. inspire, empower, and share my story with others since there is VERY LITTLE on running and competing pregnant out there b. Just to get my fat ass out the door each day and the more followers I have the more I feel like I have an obligation to go! Whatever works! Those of you following and commenting are helping me more than you know! Thanks again for your support!    Baby Germain is the size of a... I didn't check... This week's craving: Tums. This week's aversion: Tums. MONDAY- 0: I had that hip issue Monday so thought I'd rest today. After 14 days straight of running pregnant, probably was a good decision. I thought about going to Yoga, but today was Day 1 of the Kinetic Revolution and I thought that would be enough. I was really stressed about Raea starting Day Care as well... So I just wanted to get home and make sure everything was ready. TUESDAY- 0. Raea's first day of Day Care! I could have run today... but I wanted to spend time with Raea and NOT with her in the stroller.... My back/hips were still sore. Plus, she is so much fun in the backyard. I did get to chase her around a bit! I also did the Kinetic Revolution Day 2. WEDNESDAY- 3 easy miles from home. THE most perfect running weather. My back and hips felt better but still some hypermobility on the right side. I think the kinetic Rev. will help. THURSDAY- 0. Got rear-ended as I headed to the fun run. I had every intention of running 5... BUT due to inattentive drivers, I spent the whole evening on the phone being transferred to someone who could help me figure out if I needed to go to the hospital or not. I did NOT need to go, but was supposed to lay low and monitor from home. No running FRIDAY- 0: No running again. a. I wanted to be on the safe side after yesterday, b. it was disgusting rain, c. If I were to run it was going to be in North Andover where I was meeting teammates for Plant Nite... and the traffic was INSANE because... again... people don't know how to drive... So it took WAY longer to get to where I was going and there wasn't time. I really didn't care. I took it as a sign to rest another day to make sure all is good. SATURDAY- Planned for 4, ended up 5.6. Well, Matt and I slept in. We weren't off to a great start. We stayed up for #breaking2... and I didn't hear the monitor. (Raea threw every stuffed animal and blanket out of her crib while she waited for me... pooped in her diaper, and when I finally heard her she was screaming "Yucka, Yucka! Poop!".... yup, gold star parent today! I felt bad at first, but MAN the extra sleep felt good!) We had a tight schedule to begin with so the late start wasn't great. We weren't able to run in the morning so we just packed clothes and would try to fit it in later. We went to visit Matts sister and our Niece and Nephew for Reilly's birthday since we couldn't make the actual party. After hanging out for a few hours, we hit up the Rail Trail near them. I've never run on it and it was pretty rugged. It's also apparently a place where both my phone and GPS had trouble connecting to a signal. I looked down at my watch after what felt like a mile. I had been running for 8 minutes and the mileage said .36... WHAAATTT?! The terrain wasn't THAT rugged! but I believed the GPS because I'm a slave to it, obviously... and also because I was pushing the stroller, and the bumps are WAY harder with the stroller (I also didn't want a flat... I've had enough trouble with vehicles of ANY KIND this week!). I turned around for an easy out and back at 2 miles for a total of 4.... but when I reached 4 there was still more!... When I got back to the car my watch read 4.7 so I assume it was 2.7 out and 2.7 back. My watch said 57ish minutes, so I continued on until I hit 1 hour for a total of 5.6 miles and some SNEAKY elevation gain which explains my need to walk through some Braxton Hicks a few times in the last mile or so... (hills seem to trigger BH the most) SUNDAY-5. Another insanely busy day... as always... Got up early, Got Raea up, changed to meet my mom and head up to New Hampshire to see my sister run. While driving, my younger sister asked if I could pick her up from her friends house where she slept because she wanted to go to the race too. I spent 50 minutes in the car just to get to my moms to spend another 1:30 in the car to watch my sister run one of her worst races which is less than 2:30 long (but not much less, today, unfortunately). Totally worth it though. Jane is my best friend. We've experienced the sport of running very similarly... so when she races poorly it opens old wounds for me. I understand her pain and suffering... but I also know this sport is a lifetime pursuit... and what defines you as a runner changes over time. For me, I'm reevaluating what this all means for me every single day. I was happy to cool down two miles with her and Caroline. Caroline continued with me for 3 (she is racing tomorrow so kept it short.) My mom wanted to stay for the 5k and didn't mind watching Raea while I squeezed in another 2. I got back JUST as the gun for the womans 5k went off. The winner was 17:14, it was a sit and kick race which left the last 600m very exciting! First and second place only separated by 1 second after 12.5 laps of running. Janes teammate finished in 17:21 and ran a great race. After the meet we hopped over to my sister Mary's house and went out to eat which is just a few miles away. THEN the long drive back to my moms, and the drive home which was split up with some grocery shopping. It was a crazy weekend! Bathroom Breaks: 1 Yup, she's psyched about her race **TOTAL MILES: 13.5** Obviously not the week I had hoped for. No one hopes to rear-ended. The woman had the nerve to question why I was so upset when there was no damage to my car. Umm... Maybe because I have a 1 year old in the back seat and I'm 7 months pregnant, and PAY THE FUCK ATTENTION! ... On the plus side the following week should actually be better... and I'm not sure how often I'll be able to say that. Almost every week I have said "this might be the last week at this mileage"... but I'm sure I'll do better in the next few weeks than I did this week... So long as nothing weird happens! Additional Training: -Kinetic Revolution. I skipped Day 5. My heartburn was so bad from all the driving, I couldn't lay down and do drills. I was never going to sleep. Lessons Learned: 1. People suck at driving in the rain 2. People suck at driving period 3. I spend way too much time in the car. Looking Forward To: The last 5.2 miles of the Vermont City Marathon. The exact thing I looked forward to last year, I look forward to this year... Only this year will be very different. I'm actually going to get to run them. Gender Prediction: I literally have NO CLUE! Matt sort of wants a girl so we have two sisters. I'm indifferent to the gender, but I'm very happy that I'm not so stuck on boy anymore. I think this week or next I'll do some of those weird wives tales things and see if I can get any insight! ;)
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Hello!Welcome to my blog! I've been blogging for a long time on various platforms. My intention has never been to reach the masses, but rather to give myself a chance to reflect and journal. I feel it at least challenges me to be somewhat coherent, however you can expect ramblings and grammatical incorrectness here!
I've recently been diagnosed with CECS and fPAES and had it treated with BOTOX of all things... So I suspect to see more and more people looking for answers with that in the future and hope to continue blogging so there will be easy to access follow-ups as that was helpful for me. NOTE: Apologies that some of the pictures incorrectly load sometimes. I try to keep up with the glitches, but can't always! Hope it doesn't impact the blog experience for all the PAES visitors. 
My Past
May 2022
The Beginning |
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